You’d think that by now I would have learned not to watch everything my favorite actors star in, but in reality, I just wanted to see how much nerve Netflix had in taking advantage of deceased people and their suffering. Whatever you’re imagining “Blonde” to be, I can assure you it is 10 times worse.
New Zealand-Australian film director Andrew Dominik brings audiences the pseudo-biographical psychological drama based on Joyce Carol Oates’ “Blonde” novel, which is a fictional work that loosely recreates Marilyn Monroe’s life.
Ana De Armas stars as the famous movie star, who goes through a traumatic childhood, rise to fame and becomes one of the most prolific celebrities in the world.
“Blonde” explores her tumultuous life in front of the cameras and Monroe’s marriages to baseball player Joe DiMaggio (Bobby Cannavale) and playwright Arthur Miller (Adrien Brody), as well as her romance with former American president John F. Kennedy (Caspar Phillipson).
Still, this is not without Monroe’s fair share of lifelong trauma that is explicitly depicted and abused by Hollywood once again.
In her 34 years of living on this earth, I’ll be willing to bet you everything I own on the fact that De Armas has not cried as much as she did during the filming of “Blonde.” This is not surprising, as the film goes through Monroe’s most painful, public moments and tries to exhibit them in an aesthetic but quite grotesque way.
But since the “Blonde” movie budget was $22 million, I wouldn’t want all of that effort put into making another film that sexualizes and erases who Monroe really was, instead of letting her soul rest in peace. But let’s highlight what’s salvageable.
The cinematography was absolutely beautiful and artistic, especially the multiple camera angles and the change from black to color throughout the film. Even though I was on the verge of screaming my head off and certain scenes will burn my eyelids for the rest of my days, at least the content kept me engaged. Sadly, that’s all I can say about the creative decisions for this film.
I must say, De Armas’ acting was impeccable and earth-shattering. To be completely honest, I have only good things to say about her personal portrayal of Monroe. However, it was hard to enjoy any of it when I felt nauseous and uncomfortable for the entirety of the film.
I thought we were past portraying domestic abuse and sexual assault against women, or anyone for that matter, in pop culture. This says a lot about director and screenplay writer Dominik, who tries his hardest to carefully craft the most traumatizing and disgusting scenes for shock value.
The sex scenes are offputting, unnecessary and out of place. It’s like he took every possible male fetish into a melting pot and put together a monstrous, despicable piece of media disguised as art.
I truly don’t understand what being spoon-fed gender-based violence is going to do for a film besides terrorize the audience and, for those of us who don’t hate women, expose you for being a sexist pig.
I would have loved for this film to have been an actual Monroe biopic and not some lazy fiction piece that actively profits from the romanticized version of a woman that was exploited her whole life. The film paints Monroe out to be this stupid, delicate woman that serves as a manic pixie girl dream to the men in her life.
Anybody that claims to genuinely enjoy this sick and twisted male fantasy is someone you should stray away from. In fact, I am begging you to save three hours of your incredibly precious life by not watching this movie.
If I knew I was going to have to watch torture porn and talking fetuses, I would have reminisced when pro-lifers celebrated Roe v. Wade’s overturn instead.