Insecurities are problems many people deal with throughout their lifetime and it’s no secret they’re a lot more prevalent during the teenage and young adult years.
Insecurities come in many different forms. People can be insecure about their house, financial status, grades and anything that draws comparison. Yet it appears that amongst young adults, insecurity around physical appearance is the most common struggle.
With the presence of social media, comparisons have become more common, most notably with TikTok. What makes TikTok stand out compared to other social media apps is its seemingly endless content.
When you see someone else with physical features you believe look more attractive than your own, it’s natural to ask yourself, “Why don’t I look like this?” and compare yourself to them.
What’s interesting to note is how people deal with their insecurities on the internet specifically.
While many people internalize their insecurities and don’t make them known to others, there are also a lot of people who take a different, angrier approach.
There’s been a pattern of behavior on TikTok where a girl will post a video of herself doing something simple, such as showing her outfit, dancing or lip-syncing to music, and the comments will be filled with other users harassing her simply because she’s attractive.
These people go beyond just comparing themselves to others. In their minds, they’re in a contest based on attractiveness with random people on the internet who don’t know them, and what makes them angry is they believe they’re losing.
With the rise of many people seeking plastic surgery, a lot of TikTok users seem to automatically assume the only way for someone to be more attractive than them is through plastic surgery. While this is true in some cases, most of the people they’re talking about are teenagers, and it would be a lot harder to get a cosmetic procedure done if they’re under 18 years old.
Attacking someone’s appearance is a horrible thing to do, but doing it out of jealousy because of your insecurities is its own paradox. If you’re insecure about your appearance and you know someone commenting on it would upset you, then why do it to someone else?
Learning to love yourself for who you are is a tedious process, but there are steps you can take. First, since social media is a big factor in this issue, it’s important to start taking time off of it.
In addition, every time you look in the mirror, take the time to repeatedly tell yourself how beautiful and confident you are instead of tearing yourself apart. The more you repeat it to yourself, the sooner you’ll start to believe it.
Beauty is subjective, and one person may find something attractive that another person might not. However, you should never identify your facial features as your only means of self-worth.
Basing your value around what physical features someone might find attractive or unattractive and having their opinion dictate your life is unhealthy.
Until you put in the work to start loving and appreciating your features, it’s important to realize harassing someone online because of your own internalized struggles won’t make your insecurities go away.